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We crashed a foreigner birthday party at Island Stone downtown in City Hall. I was thinking “Not bad for a Friday night… but what this place really needs is some lazers.” When all of a sudden… PEW PEW PEW. And fire-breathing too. That’s how we party on Jeju Island.

A drunk blonde came up to me and said “What’s your name.”

“Philip,” I said.

“Philip,” she said. “Philip. How about Phil. Is it all right if I call you Phil?”

“No.”

“Phil…or how about… Peter? …Phil, Peter or Eric. Which of those names do you want me to call you?”

“Philip.”

And that was the end of that conversation.